Relationship Coaching For Men


Men And Relationship Issues

It would feel great wouldn’t it to be free from the emotional turmoil and tension in your relationship?  Let’s have a look at how this can be made possible for you with the challenges you are facing at the moment. 

It is important to be understanding about this particular challenge for men.

To have the expectation that men will freely acknowledge they are not successful in any area of their life could be considered an unrealistic expectation.  When it comes to relationship issues this can be especially true.

In most cultures it is considered that the role of the male is one of the provider, the strong one, the rock on which the family unit relies.  He is not necessarily expected to be in touch with his inner emotions or to express these.  After all, isn’t that why females were created – to be the emotional backbone of relationships?  

I am not sure what you think or feel about this.  I believe both male and female have the capacity to express their emotions and for a relationship to be healthy and grow it is essential for both parties in the relationship to be able to express their emotions respectfully and lovingly.  However I also believe it is important to appreciate that it is often seen as a weakness in certain cultures or family structures for the male to express tender emotions or to know how to respond to their partner when they express emotion.

When stress comes into a relationship generally the male will have one or a number of the following reactions:

  • Deny that it exists
  • Ignore it in the hope that their partner will “get over it”  or put up with it
  • Stop communicating
  • Behave in an abrupt, dismissive manner
  • Express anger

Does any of this relate to your situation?

If it does, what can be done to overcome this relationship challenge and to assist you or your male partner open up and communicate about the issues creating stress in your committed relationship?

Two major factors that can prevent men from acknowledging there is an issue in their relationship are :

  1. a sense of embarrassment; and
  2. a belief that they simply do not have the skills to work through “touchy” relationship issues.

Would it bring a sense of relief to you if you knew there is no reason for this to be the case?

Let’s have a broader look at this.

If you have a relationship problem at work or on the job you talk to the relevant person to come to an agreement on how the issue can be resolved.  Why is it then that men find it difficult to discuss issues impacting on the most important relationship in their life?   The difference is the emotional stakes in the workplace are not as high as in committed relationships.  The mindset can be that managing “relationship stuff” in the workplace is reasonably easy compared to managing “relationship stuff” at home.  In a committed relationship the emotional stakes are very high so it is extremely important to gain the knowledge of how to manage the tough, touchy issues in committed relationships.   

Good News:

The answer to the dilemma faced by males in relation to how they can handle things when they are confronted with emotional issues or strain in their committed relationship is not difficult at all. 

Knowledge and understanding are the keys

It is as simple as that:

  • knowledge about yourself, your emotional responses and behaviours and how to manage these;
  • knowledge on how to respond when your partner raises a need they have in their life for more emotional support and expression within the relationship or any other “touchy” relationship issue.

What could happen if you made a choice to continue on in your usual pattern of not asking for help? It is important for you to think about this.   

  • You could be living in a relationship that is in a continual state of stress and tension
  • You could be continually getting frustrated even angry with your partner which is very draining on your energy levels
  • The stress and tension could begin to impact on your performance in the workplace
  • Your children could begin to suffer from living in the stressful environment.   Children are very sensitive human beings and they sense much more than we often realise.  They are receptors of the tension in your relationship and this can impact on their health, sleeping patterns and performance at school
  • You could feel like you want to run away from it all and toss it in
  • Ultimately if the stress and tension is not dealt with you could lose your relationship and your family.

Is this the way you want to live your life?

It is time for you to act now and receive the benefit coaching can bring into your relationship. Through relationship coaching you will learn the skills of:

  • Managing your response when your partner raises issue that create a sense of confrontation or tension for you
  • Dealing with the tough, touchy conversations that happen in committed relationships
  • Turning relationship stress into relationship harmony
  • Building strong communication strategies into your relationship
  • Integrating effectively your life, work and family commitments